Saturday, June 9, 2012

We've all been there - waiting for that guy you've been staring at across the bar to come over and chat you up, or being the guy contemplating if he's going to go for it. So I have to ask, when is it a good idea to ask for that hot girl's number?

I will say that I have not had to do the Can-I-get-your-number dance too often, and frankly, that's fine with me. I can only assume this is why guys are hesitant to ask for a girls number. They know we get annoyed with it and they know there's a good chance we'll give them a phony number. I give kudos to the guy from St. Patty's day who not only asked for my number, but came back and asked me for it again after I gave him the wrong one (oops). So why does it always seem the guys who ask for our numbers are the ones we don't want to give it to?

My roommate walks in yesterday from grocery shopping and shares her adventures in Wal-Mart, which include being asked for her number. Twice. Really guys? In a Wal-Mart? I mean, I get that a bar is probably not the best place to meet someone not looking for a midnight romp, but with that in mind, I would say Wal-Mart is definitely not much higher on the list. After this story, the three of us girls launch into tales of our experiences and I pose the question of leagues. We all know the idea of "leagues" in dating, and while we all say we don't agree with it, we all know we do. So why is it the guys that ask for a girls number always seem to shoot out of their league?

Think of it as baseball, boys. There are the minors and the majors, the triple AAA's and the doubles. Don't ask a girl in the majors for her number if you're still back doing the triple A thing. Or do, just don't expect it to be a good number. If she is into you, she'll come talk to you. Because that's the thing, at a certain point in life, we ladies stop being so shy and end up going after what we want. If the bar is closing soon and you've just been returning my stares all night, you better believe I'll come say hi before the night ends.


  1. As a guy I don't often ask for numbers, and *rarely* at a bar; the ratio of bogus numbers to good numbers is staggering, or at least it is to me. At the same time I can count the number of girls who have come up to me at a bar or anywhere else to introduce themselves on the fingers of one hand. So something has to happen, and usually that means I either have to "man up" and ask for a probably bad number, or I have to resign myself to yet another "what if" story.

    To continue your comparison, most of those ballplayers are waiting for their shot to get out of the minors and into the majors, and they can't do that just sitting around and hoping, they've got to put up the effort of trying, over and over to get that break, hoping someone in the majors will maybe give them a chance.

  2. I like the analogy you decided to use instead of going with the number system. But in baseball they say that many of the players already have the skills to play in the majors, they just lack the confidence. So if it isn't enough to confidently ask, then what skills
    put you in the majors?

    Also you have to realize that compared to women, men are highly less aware of their surroundings. You could be holding that stare longer or smile at them and we'd be oblivious most of the time.

    But in the end, despite whether or not you've given us signals to come over to you, if we think you're worth it we'll talk to you/ask you for your number no matter what.