Thursday, July 21, 2011

When does caring become overbearing?

We all have friends and family that love us and will tell us the absolute truth with no hesitations. But it begs the question, where is the line between caring and overbearing? At times I have felt that any relaying of thoughts, opinions or emotions have been a good thing but as of late, I have gone the other route. Realizing that sometimes, what people think and say might push you towards the very thing they are trying to prevent. So where is the line?

You would think we would take all thoughts and words into consideration. Everyone counts on their friends to have their backs, be the shoulder to cry on and tell them the facts up front without sugar coating it. So why do we get upset when our friends are brutally honest with us? Isn’t that what we claim to always expect from them? And why is it, that when some people tell us the truth, we choose to ignore it?

Brutal honesty is my forte. I hate sugar coating because well, how is someone going to learn if you try to make it seem like less than it is? They won’t. But here’s my question. If we turn to our friends for advice and their outside opinion, why is it so easy to become annoyed with them when we get it? Is it because we don’t like what we hear? Or is it because we know they’re right?

I count on my friends for a number of things and I hate the fact that sometimes I doubt their valuable and irreplaceable opinions. But when I've heard the same thing from multiple people, sometimes I just want to throw it back in their face and say, sorry 'bout ya. And I can only imagine friends of mine saying the same thing about "advice" I have given them. So the question remains, when does caring become overbearing? Where is the line that, once crossed, pushes people closer to the outcome you want them to avoid? And why isn't it clearly marked so that all friends can stop before they get too close?

1 comment:

  1. I completely understand what you mean. There have been so many times that I've truly valued others' opinions, but there have been just as many times that I get their opinion and completely blow it off.

    I think you've brought up some great questions, and honestly I don't know the answer of where the line is. I think sometimes you need to step on people's toes. So maybe the line is meant to be crossed.

    Something else to keep in mind. Even if you don't take the advice or accept the opinions of the people who are closest to you, you'll always remember they cared about you enough to share it. And the same goes in the other direction. Just knowing that, I think, makes it worth stepping over that boundary.

    Great post, lady. :) I really enjoy your writing.